See photos of my stretch marks and tummy

It’s time to share some photos of my tummy! Many of my friends have said that I am brave sharing my experience and having such a large procedure. Doing those things is nothing compared to showing the photos!

My tummy is something I hide! I get embarrassed when my shirt comes up slightly in public! I was mortified when my father mentioned something about my tummy a few months ago. What he said was fine but the fact that it indicated that he had seen it is what mortified me!

You can see the skin over my leggings at the front and on the sides as well

I like that you can see the line of my abs in this photo. Even the area at the bottom of the photo is extra skin.

That is all extra skin

I understand that while many people may look at these photos and think ‘it’s not that bad’ or ‘but my tummy is bigger than yours’, that my ‘embarrassment’ is about the way my tummy looks and feels to me. I hope my friends and family reading this know that I don’t judge their bodies the way I judge my own!

11th June 2011: House of tears

Today my daughter asked me about the tummy tuck again. I still haven’t even mentioned it to my kids. She got very upset today, even crying. She said that unless I promised her that I wouldn’t get a tummy tuck that she would ‘move out’. She packed her bags and even had my younger daughter packing her bags, both ready to move out.

When she would finally listen to me I asked her why she was so upset and she explained that it was because she likes me just the way I am. It took some convincing but I explained to her that ‘just the way I am’ isn’t healthy for my tummy. That I can’t pick up heavy things (including her), that it makes my tummy and back weak, and that parts of my insides are in the wrong place. A tummy tuck would fix those problems as well as making my tummy look the way it did before it got stretched.

I thought that perhaps if I showed her some photos of me before I had the twins it may help her to understand that mummy hasn’t always had a wobbly belly, and I would be the same person. She saw some lovely photos of me on my honeymoon. My tummy was flat and thin. I also had short hair! She was quite happy with the way I looked in the photo, including the short hair. So we have a deal. If I decide to have a tummy tuck, she can decide what I do with my hair- cut it, grow it, or keep it the same.

My youngest daughter wants to choose my hair colour! My son doesn’t know what all the fuss is about. Everyone is happy in the household- phew!

7th June 2011: Feeling good

The surgery is a certainty, at least in my mind now. I think that confirms that it is the right thing for me to do.

I have been working hard every day doing sit ups, eating healthy and exercising as much as I can. Hopefully this will help with recovery following my tummy tuck. It would also be great to have ‘instant abs’ once the surgery is done. I know that they are there, but are hidden under skin and lumpy hernia bits.

I haven’t told my children about it yet but my eldest daughter is clever. She has tried to make sure that I know that she loves my tummy the way it is on numerous occasions, since she saw me writing this article. The other day she got a glimpse of my tummy while I was lying in bed and she sternly said “Mummy…. Show me your tummy. Did the doctor give you a little bit of a tummy tuck? Tell me the truth”. My younger daughter loves the way my wrinkly belly feels and likes to dig her fingers (and sometimes her toes) into the skin. My son doesn’t seem to have any deep connection to my tummy the way the girls do. I will explain to them what is going to happen when the time comes closer. I hope that as long as they know that I am the same mummy, that they will be ok.

26th May 2011: "Mummy, I love you just the way you are"

I was working on this article when my daughter walked in the room. She saw the title ‘Tummy Tuck’ and asked me what a tummy tuck is. I explained to her that it is when a doctor fixes someone’s tummy so that it is not flabby anymore. Her response- “I think you would look better without a tummy tuck, I love your tummy”. To top it off she gave me the biggest hug and with tears in her eyes said “I love you, how you are”.

Well this has thrown a spanner in the works! For a little while I was considering that maybe I shouldn’t have the procedure until she is a bit older and can understand why I need to do it. But deep down I know that I need to do it. I need to do it for my self-esteem, happiness and for my health.  Am I giving my daughter bad messages? Should I just get the hernia fixed and keep the flabby tummy? Yep all these thoughts are running through my mind. Deep down,  I still want to do it though.

24th May 2011: Booked in

Today, right on 8.30am, I rang the doctor’s office and asked to be booked for my abdominal reconstruction procedure- an abdominoplasty. I have a conditional booking for the 10^th August- two and a half months away! I have to see the doctor two more times before my date will be confirmed. I feel really nervous. Not so much about the procedure but about the impact on my life. I will need time off work and lots of help at home with my kids. I am excited as well, but it seems SO long away!

22nd May 2011: My first appointment with the plastic surgeon

Today I had my first appointment with a plastic surgeon. I felt really nervous on the way. My nerves lessened as soon as I saw the specialist as he took another patient in. Phew…. He looked lovely, friendly and down to earth.

When it was my turn, we first had a chat about why I wanted a tummy tuck, what the procedure involves and he showed me some photos of tummy tucks that he had done. Then the doctor looked at my tummy. The funny thing is that after 5 years of hating my tummy, this was the first time that a doctor had ever looked at it and given me real advise. Well, I am still feeling shocked by what he said. Firstly I felt really proud that he said that I was in good shape and obviously looked after myself. Who doesn’t like a compliment? The not so good news was that my abdominal muscles are quite separated and damaged; also that I have two hernias- one quite bad. No wonder I don’t feel very strong and can’t lift things up. So not only does my stomach look bad but it is not normal!

Hernias can cause quite severe medical problems and tend to get worst over time. There is no way that I want to be having hernia problems later on in life when I can fix it now while I am relatively young and healthy.

The doctor said that he wouldn’t let me book for the procedure today; I had to go home and think about it. However now I am surer than ever that I want to get this done; even if it means getting a loan to cover the cost.

Tonight I spoke to my husband about all the finer details. He agreed that I should go ahead with it. I told my mum too and she was supportive as well.

1 week to go until my appointment

I am so excited that my appointment is just next week. I have been eating well and increased my exercise; so that I can be in as good shape as possible when I see the Plastic surgeon. Even seeing my tummy through tight clothes isn’t bothering me at the moment because I hope it will be gone soon. I am really looking forward to the appointment.

One month until my appointment

It is still one month until my appointment. I know that I decided that I wouldn’t have a tummy tuck but I am feeling sad about this decision. I see my tummy in the mirror or see the overhang when I am wearing tight clothes, and I don’t think I can happily live with it. Yes I agreed that I SHOULD be happy with my body the way it is, but that doesn’t mean that I am happy or will be. I am so glad that I haven’t cancelled my appointment!

Changing my mind

I have been talking to my friends about having a tummy tuck. Some of them knew about my tummy, most of them didn’t. Besides one friend who was totally supportive and agreed that she felt I should have a tummy tuck, most of my other friends were surprised that I was even considering it. They have tried to convince me that I should be happy with my body the way that it is- they have succeeded! I agree that I SHOULD be happy with my body the way it is, and decide that I won’t have a tummy tuck. I’m not going to cancel my appointment yet though!

Visit to my GP

Today I had to go to the GP for my son. While I was there I decided to ask him for some advice about my tummy. I was hoping he could answer some of my questions about what a tummy tuck involves and maybe give me some encouragement to look into it further. My doctor wasn’t very helpful, he seemed dismissive even. He gave me a referral for a well regarded plastic surgeon but didn’t even look at my tummy. I left feeling judged and wondering if I was being frivolous and self-obsessed. Despite feeling that way, I went home and made my appointment with the plastic surgeon. The next available appointment is still two months away- I took it, I can always cancel if I change my mind.

Talking to my Mum

My mum has always known about ‘the tummy’. Today I told her that I thought it was ‘time’. She asked lots of questions that I couldn’t answer like “how much will it cost?” and “How will you look after the kids?” But was clear that she was supportive, and even offered to have some time off work to help me, if I needed it!

Talking to my husband about cosmetic surgery

Today the topic of my ‘tummy’ came up again. Instead of the usual umming and ahing, my husband said he thinks I should look into getting a tummy tuck. He said that he hoped it would make me happier and easier to live with. I told him that I am not sure that it will make me easier to live with,  I will still get annoyed when the house is a mess or it has been a few weeks since the lawns have been mowed. It will however make me happier with my body and stop me from looking in the mirror and grabbing all the loose skin into a bundle as I imagine that it was gone. He still thought I should get it done.

What is wrong with Mummy's tummy? Tummy tuck after twins.

Being fit, healthy and looking after my body has been a part of my life since my teenage years. When I had my first baby at 28 years old, I was relieved that after about a year of giving birth, my body was in its pre-pregnancy shape (well almost). My body shape was different- my hips were a bit wider and my boobs weren’t as pert but with some hard work my belly was nice and flat, and I felt good.

Giving birth to twins was a different story! During my pregnancy I went from a tiny 50kg to a massive 80kg! The weight gain didn’t bother me because I knew that weight gain was a part of pregnancy and was important to have healthy babies. I had already proved to myself that I could get back into good shape.

These are photos of me about 3 days before i gave birth to my twins- I looked (and felt) like I was going to 'pop'!

The fact that I delivered two healthy babies, weighing in at 3490grams and 2940grams, meant that I had done a good job of incubating and growing my twins. By the time they were 6 weeks old, I was back to a close to normal 53kg. But one thing that wasn’t normal was the appearance of my tummy! When my twins were only 2 days old I noticed that the space that they had filled in my tummy was now floppy and felt and looked like a slow deflating balloon. It was soft, saggy and there was lots of skin! It was at that moment that I understood why some people turn to cosmetic surgery.

My twins are nearly 5 years old now and being fit, healthy and looking after my body is still a priority for me- one that I fit around work, parenting and home duties. Five years on and I am in pretty good shape but the appearance of my tummy looks horrible. Even when I am dressed the skin hangs over the top of my jeans, underwear and leggings. I am constantly ‘tucking’ the skin into my pants. Not only does my tummy look unattractive but it also feels weak. When I lift things I feel like I have no stomach strength and all the effort goes to my lower back, I wonder if this is because of the state of my stomach.

After thinking about considering having a tummy tuck for almost the whole 5 years since my twins were born, I have finally decided to bite the bullet and do something about it. Here is my journey.